Thursday, October 20, 2005

Here's A Thought!

"I just have to share this again today because Im so freaking excited!! We told all of our parents (6 of them! LOL) that we are PG last night!! My mom must have called me back like 10 times to talk about stuff and to tell me she wants to be called Nana" Message Board Poster on 10/20/05

So that is how your mother is supposed to respond! Someone should tell that to mine. Mother-in-Law has called twice to "check up" on us and see how everything is going. MY MOTHER was "forced" to call me only because J called her and told her that she might want to show some interest in her only daughter and the pregnancy! For fucks sake, she was the one who was harassing J and I about having children and her wanting to be a grandparent only a few months ago! Shit, MIL has already asked where we're registered at and has told us that she'll be helping us buy the crib. What has my mother done? Jack shit! She only does stuff when her hand is forced and even then it's difficult.
Ugh, I wish I had a magic answer to figure out what to do. I've tried the have a deep talk with her, one on one and all that crap! She puts up a wall and doesn't take it down. I keep hoping for some miracle change. I keep hoping that she'll blow all of my assumptions/opinions about her out of the water and prove me wrong. I keep hoping that she'll do more than feign interest in me. Sometimes I wonder why she even bothers? Why pretend to care if all you'd rather do is be off by yourself? That's the impression I get.
Then I wonder why do I get so worked up by her?! If that's the way she wants to be, then let her. But why does it bother me soo much? Probably because she's my mother and I'd like to have a decent relationship with her like many other mother-daughters do. I guess it stems from me holding out hope that she'll prove me wrong and really be interested in my life. I guess I should put that hope to bed. She hasn't changed since I was a little girl so the chances of her doing something different now are, well...........I'm not going to hold my breath.